Today has been short. I woke up at 2pm, made peanut butter toast, then called Frank. Being that I can't hold my interest to one thing we didn't have a very long talk. Later I took a shower and went to see him a his work. I sat in the back eating Fumiyoshi and talked to Billy a bit. Now I'm home again, downloading music as always and thinking too much about nothing.
Honestly I want a hair cut, I want to starve myself, and I don't want to wake up early in the morning. I want to sleep to my death. Frank's looking up hair styles as we speak, and I just need to do the rest. Every thing's been going great, I just keep holding myself back.
Tomorrow I'm going to get stuff done to my car at 8am then I have to go to dumbass counseling. I'm so tired of being forced to talk about my emotions. If I want to hold everything inside I think that should be my decision, I just want to be a kid and not worry about my own thoughts and care taking. I want my Nanny to cut up my cheese sticks, and read me a book while I sit on the couch upside down eating them. Starting tomorrow, I swear to God, I'm done with saying this and that and not doing it. I'll set up guide lines for myself, and not step out of place. I can't control others, but dammit I can control myself.
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